Thursday, August 24, 2006

Don't bother.

Walking home from yoga Tuesday night, a man slowed down in his piece-of-crap car beside Kate and I. "You're two beautiful ladies." We didn't say anything back. "You're two hot ladies." Nothing. We walked a bit faster. Silently. He drove off.

"Yeah, thanks. Now we'll give you head." Kate laughed.

On my way to work yesterday, I walked by a strike. Triton Construction, I believe. A large rat was blown up and looking grotesque. I keep forgetting to research that. What's the rat for exactly? Lots of yelling. I walked on the other side of the street. "Lookin' good, baby," a deep male voice yelled. "Want to give me your number?"

Yeah, thanks. Why don't you stop that picketing and come over here so I can give you head.

I left work last night and waited at a light to walk across Mass Ave. A man's face popped throughout the window of a Cadillac to my left. "Mmmmm Mmmmm. What's your name?" I crossed to the other side of the road. "Oooh, a feisty one," he yelled.

Thanks. I'm Sam. Can I give you head?

It's like the dent in the side of my car that I got from trying to park in my alley way spot. In the parking lot of the Arlington Target in June, a crappy man in an even crappier car yelled out to me. "I do auto body. Want an estimate?"

Goodness. What do these people think? Are they really that clueless?

It happened last week in the Whole Foods parking lot. Another guy pull up to me, "Hey." I didn't respond. "Hey." "Hey." "Excccccccccuse me." "Hey."

"YES! " I finally answered.

"I can fix that dent. Want an estimate?"

"NO."

"You don't even want to hear my estimate?"

"NO."

I got in my car and went to back out. He kept his car right behind mine. For like 10 minutes. I finally got out of my car and began walking to security. He moved.

Now I'm definitely going to want you to fix my car!

Here's a quick clue to creeps everywhere: don't bother. If you wouldn't meet me out or I wouldn't come into your store/ auto shop, don't try. Seek help.

2 Comments:

  • At August 25, 2006, Blogger ljdurocher said…

    Sam, The rat is a regular at union pickets. It's just an ugly icon to represent union protests. If it could speak it would say "So I moved your fucking cheese. You wanna do something about it?"

    Just an icon that unions use. People think it is ugly so they do what they can to help the unions so they take it down. There's your research.

    Hope everything is well. Gonna give me head now? Just kidding!

    Luke

     
  • At August 25, 2006, Blogger Irish Red said…

    DUDE! I'm right there with you - what do these men think this will accomplish?? Perhaps its because you're so out of their league, they have no other way to even approach you - kinda like going to princess di's wedding...you KNOW she won't see you, but you go anyway?

    The question is, if it were Jude Law in a ferrari yelling "hey baby", would you still be ticked off?? or flattered?

     

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