Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Greek Murder!

At UMass, the Stockbridge School of Agriculture is impressive. The fraternity associated with this school, ATG (We called them all Farmer Boys. Once they actually dug and lined a pool in their front lawn for rush week. I swear people got pregnant swimming in it.), owned the property that was Fraternity Row. Besides 3 fraternities in different locations, the majority of a sorority girl's freshman year was spent on Frat Row.

So, when ATG put the property up for sale on eBay, everyone was in shock. The end of an actual era. ZooMass would never be the same.

Then the University bought the property.

And now, the University has forced ATG to demolish the houses one at a time.

The first house to go is Sigma Alpha Mu, aka Sammy. I initially came to visit Sammy when a annoying girl on my hallway came yelling that she needed volunteers for the dating game at one of the fraternities. Along with her was a guy named Zach, who I am actually still friends with today. My roommate agreed to go and then all insisted I go as well. I changed quickly, and arrived at Sammy about 20 minutes later.

It was the second night of rush. I was told I'd be asking potential rushes dating questions, and the more outlandish the better. I should also note, at the time, I had an extreme Southern accent. When I sat down, call it the stage ham in me, but I was good. I was really good. My best question which followed me for 4 years of college, "I really miss my puppy dog. She's at home in Alabama. Can you get on all fours and tell me why you think it'd be great to be my puppy dog?"

I met a Sammy about a month later who I dated for a bit. Then I decided I didn't really like him, and I asked his pledge brother to come with me to my formal. That guy ended up being the biggest sleaze on earth. Luckily, I found out the important reason most girls didn't date Sammy's before I did anything I'd regret. I can't tell you why, but let's just say it involved this guy trying to video tape every girl he dated.... and him generally dating more than one person at one time.

Sammy, yeah, no harm done to the campus with that house demolished!


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