Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Let the BBQ Season Begin!

I love the smell of hickory chip smoke in my hair after lightin' up the charcoal and noshing on burgers and dogs with my friends. I love barbecue sauce and baked beans and pasta salad and Ruffles served with beer and much laughter. My favorite thing about the end of winter has become the promise of nights spent on the back porch of my apartment.

Last night, we gathered to fire up my Weber and celebrate Suave's 27th birthday. A catastrophe involving using my Match Light charcoal that I stored away from last November (and didn't work anymore, apparently), didn't stop us from enjoying pieces of turkey burger (I didn't defrost all the way), soy burgers, chicken, and dogs.

My brother's still in town (that's him above in the picture on the left), so it was nice for him to see the low-key side of DC. He interviewed yesterday which got me thinking about my new favorite party game: Asking people classic interview questions but to get a real answer.

I tried some out last night. Here are some of the funnier responses:

What are your real strengths and weaknesses at work?

Strengths: Never taking a lunch break. Typing fast. Attention to details. Ability to align PowerPoint labels quickly. Outlasting people at anything. Amazing softball player. Covering for coworkers when they go get a manicure mid-day. Offering to get coffee for the whole office regularly even if it's just an excuse to get out of the office. Multi-tasking by IMing while on boring conference calls. Looking busy even when not doing a thing. Playing tech support to moronic coworkers.

Weaknesses: Spider Solitaire. Social networking sites. Being ultra-moody when PMSing. Pedicures in the afternoon. Personal phone calls. Going to the water cooler regularly. Taking 30 minutes to do something that you bill a client 5 hours to complete. Listening to Broadway musicals and annoying coworkers without caring. Zoning out when being talked to about projects. General contempt for everything and anything. Picking nose in office when no one's looking. Spitting on the floor.

Name a time you took a risk that paid off?

Driving home slightly buzzed. Stopping on the side of the highway to puke. Peeing in an alley way with a cop on a side street. Using a really bad fake ID to get into a bar. Hooking up with a friend's ex boyfriend. Having sex in a public place. Stealing a soda from the office fridge. Dancing on a bar filled with truckers. Deciding drunk that Divinyl's "I Touch Myself" is a wonderful karaoke song choice for a group of girls to sing in front of fraternity guys.

Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

Knocked up. Married to Prince William. Firing people like the interviewer for dressing poorly. At Neiman Marcus lunching with the ladies on the Upper East Side rather than working. Getting Botox injections. Wondering why people ask these types of questions in interviews. Legally changing names after being caught for looking at porn on-line. Married to a movie star. Reading about finally finding out who the father of Dannielynn Hope Marshall Stern.

The game could go on and on. I suggest playing it your next event. It's pretty freakin' funny.

4 Comments:

  • At April 11, 2007, Blogger I-66 said…

    I have a little charcoal grill in my trunk that goes with me everywhere, mostly because we use it at tailgates for United and I'm just too lazy to take it out. I'm regularly marinating some sort of meat in some sort of sauce for grilling, so to say I'm ready to sit out on our soon-to-be stained deck, drinking a beer, grilling some meat, and smoking the hookah... well, that's an understatement.

     
  • At April 11, 2007, Blogger LJ said…

    Hmmmm so are these all your responses to the questions or a composite of overall responses?

     
  • At April 11, 2007, Blogger GreenEggsSamDC said…

    Oh no this is a composite. OMG, can you imagine if all those were mine. Goodness. I'd need to be in rehab for the risk section alone!

     
  • At April 11, 2007, Blogger GreenEggsSamDC said…

    Oh, and i-66, when we goin' tailgating????

     

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