The Sum VS. The Parts

In typical relationship fighting, the sum of the parts is greater than each isolated part. On Monday, APK and I planned a night in at his apartment to cook faijitas and watch American Idol (Go Katherine McPhee!).

A) I was going to the grocery store on Monday night and offered to get the needed ingredients. It wasn't very expensive. Probably $15 all together since I had guacamole at my house already. I didn't expect him to help pay for the meal. I'm certainly okay to spend $15.

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B) Yesterday morning, I e-mail APK to find out what I should do about work the next morning. We decided that it'd be easiest if I drove over to his house, found parking nearby, and came home to change at my place the next morning. I also joke about my Nazi behavior in the kitchen. He says he's okay with my authoritative cooking habits.

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C) APK e-mailed me again to suggest that I park on 16th Street when the spots opened at 6:30pm, but that I'd have to leave that evening to avoid ticketing. He also mentions in a later e-mail that he hopes I don't have to leave right after American Idol finishes...

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I doubted whether or not I should go over. I bought the food, drove over to his apartment, cooked the food, give him some action, and then leave. I now feel a bit like a pro bono hooker. No good. He doesn't understand. He offers to pay for the dinner. He suggests I take a cab to his place, stay overnight, and bring work clothes for today. I try best to explain that each part separately is not an issue. It's the sum of all the parts that creates the dilemma.

In dating fights, the build-up of A+B+C most always equals something greater and possibly entirely different than each isolated part.