Thursday, May 18, 2006

Scenes from a Mall

My cousin actually worked on that Woody Allen movie with Bette Midler... a movie set in a mall... with 2 Jews... of course, I'd be connected to it...

But anyways.

Last night, I went to buy a present for APK that needed 2 hours to be prepared. I ended up wandering in the mall. Popped into Claire's Accessories, a store I'd not been into in a good 12 years, only to find it filled with half-naked tweens mulling over chandelier earrings. Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen's picture topped the jewelry rounds, and Brittany Spears perfume was displayed on the register. However, I was excited to see a line of jewelry and cosmetics designed by an actual hero... Bethany Hamilton, the surfer tween who was attacked by a shark but got right back out there to surf only 4 weeks after the trauma. She reminded me of Samantha Smith from my youth. Real teen heroes for the next generation of women are scarce. Are we to expect a nation of leaders when the biggest triumph their teen idol faces is the battle against anorexia?

On the personal front, Shabbat Cluster controversy is in the midst. My cousin's convinced it's a conspiracy.

IH, SG, and I all requested to be in the same Cluster. I also requested APK. APK requested me, or so he says. IH, SG, and I are all in the same Cluster without APK. He doesn't know who's Cluster he's in though. SC got her list, and he's not in that one.

Anyways, who is in my Cluster is even more odd. There were over 200 people who signed up making up 31 Clusters. In my 13 person Cluster are three of my friends and BG, who I'm officially not talking to.

SC asked if I wanted to request that the group be reshuffled. Honestly, I don't see the 3 people in my group all that much, so it will be nice to see them. And, there are a bunch of people I don't know in the group too. And, I believe way too much in things happening for a reason to want to change the course of how things ended up. It seems to me that since I assume the people putting these groups together have no knowledge of my personal drama, that some how the world is telling me that I'm indeed supposed to have BG in my life.

Of course he's rather immature and I wouldn't be surprised if he asked to be transferred, but I refuse to do so...

I e-mailed, simply, to him: Subject: Shabbat Cluster. Text: Is this the world's way of telling us we're supposed to be in one another's life?

No response. But hey, can't say I didn't try. Honestly, doubt we'd ever be good friends again. We're just so different when it comes to what we think constitutes a good friend and a good person. I believe a good friend includes you in their life and puts you before their own pleasure sometimes. I believe a good person gives to the people they love- with time, respect, patience, money. I get mad when he leaves two of the people he considers his close friends behind in a bad neighborhood to walk with a girl he wants to hook up with, but barely knows, and then calls himself a good person because he donated bone marrow to a total stranger AND judges me for saying I wouldn't do it. I get mad when he tells me a gazillion stories about his fabulous life not ever asking me to come along for any of the enjoyment and then reports back to me how much money he gave to charity. I find these huge actions of charity to be a mask for the selfishness of a person... unless they are really a giving person, and in general, I don't find him to be one with me. In my opinion, we're not meant to be friends... but apparently, we're meant to be in the same world...


Post a Comment

<< Home