Geez....

I'm a HUGE fan of minor league baseball. I'm not sure if you knew that or not, but I love small stadiums and laid back fans and funky mascots and cheap ticket prices. When Jerk and I road-tripped from Connecticut to Alabama back in the summer of 2004, we spent 4th of July in Bowie Maryland, actually, at the Bowie Baysox game. I never imagined I'd be living in DC at the time.

A year later in New York, Jerk and I had woken up at 9am on the morning the Brooklyn Cyclones tickets for the 2005 season went on sale. We got 4 tickets in the best section for months later assuming we'd invite another couple along. We also had tickets to several Staten Island Yankee games throughout the 2005 season. The last official day Jerk and I ever spent as a couple was going to see the Staten Island Yankees with Lori and Joel on a Saturday. That was the night he left me on the subway to go stay at Candice's apartment... unapologetic. Which is why I demanded he leave me custody of the 4 Cyclone's tickets. And he did.

I invited Chris and Angelina to join me. Chris was the last guy I dated in college... and the last guy I'd dated before meeting Jerk and diving into a three year relationship. Chris is also one of the only examples of someone I have been able to date and remain close friends with, possibly because he's really one of the greatest guys on the planet. And, Angelina thought that Jerk was a complete tool.

So, Chris brought the girl he was seeing at the time. We had decided that since we were going to Coney Island, we should dress trashy. I was wearing a white tank top with a noticeable neon yellow bra underneath and a jean skirt. Angelina looked ever chic in a wife-beater and jeans. Chris, unshaven, wore a wife-beater and cargo shorts that made him look like a hot K-fed.

Danielle, Chris's friend, wore a polk-a-dot fitted shirt with a mismatched corduroy skirt, huge platform wedges, large plastic earrings, and acrylic blue over sized glasses. "I live in Brooklyn." She said to Angelina. "These glasses are from Canal Street. I bought them in 10 colors for $1 each." "I make jewelry for a living and work at a coffee shop to pay the bills." Oh, and she was from Normal, Illinois... where State Farm Insurance is based. She mentioned that a couple of times. Mismatching your clothes like everyone else in Brooklyn when you're from Normal, apparently makes you think you are abnormal?

You can buy yard cups filled with margaritas on Coney Island and refill them throughout the amusement park. Angelina and I proceeded to drink 2 yard each, win friendship bracelets playing skeeball, and get fake pink unicorn tattoos placed on our arms. Danielle didn't crack a smile... although, she was furious when her $1 sunglasses fell off during the bumper car ride and got destroyed. I thought she had 9 other pairs?

Now, Angelina is just cool... like Spuds MacKenzie in 1987 cool... she doesn't need to discuss her coolness or individuality, and she looses patience with the wannabee hipsters of New York. Besides the fact that Danielle was yawningly boring that day, she later ended up dicking over Chris, so I don't feel badly destroying her on my blog right now. Angelina saw her drunk and acting stupidly inappropriate at an art opening shortly after she was such a dick to Chris... so she's someone who has become a source of giggles for us.

That day at the baseball game, Danielle was really excited about these baseball cuff bracelets she had been making. Chris and she were both wearing these monstrosities. Angelina and I think they were hilarious. I'd almost forgotten about that girl and her strange baseball fetish until yesterday when Angela sent me the following link.

From Angelina to Sam: Does THIS look familiar?

From Sam to Angelina: OMG! How bizarre? Seriously, if this becomes high fashion and that bitchy, self-important, wannabee hipster becomes famous... dude, I'll stick my head in an oven somewhere. She was a royal slut towards Chris too.

Okay, I'm off to sharpen my claws now. Tehe. Happy Monday.